I could care less about the Oscars, so I only caught a few parts of it in passing. Thoughts:

Can somebody who finds Jon Stewart funny explain to me... why? No, seriously. Pick a joke he's told and explain to me, in the comments, what's funny about it. Then, provided that you can, convince me that he regularly tells jokes of that nature. I've never found the guy to be terribly amusing -- not on "The Daily Show" (which largely consists of people making idiotic remarks that speak for themselves, so the bullshit he adds is pointless and unnecessary), not in the related books supposedly written by him, not on his guest spots on talk shows (though that may not quite be his fault), and now, not on the Oscars. As best I can tell, people find him amusing because of that one goofy face he makes, but if you think about it, that is, quite literally, infantile humor. But I guess I shouldn't be surprised that people find it funny, given that humanity almost entirely consists of gibbering idiots figuratively regurgitating on themselves and pissing in the air. Goo-goo, ga-ga, bitches.

Reese Witherspoon. Fucking hell. I listened to a brief commentary about the Oscars on a random news site, and the commentator went on for a bit about the "fantastic" speech that she gave. Excuse me? I actually caught that speech and I wanted to punch her in the fucking face the entire time. Was she irritating or what? The only movie I ever thought she was good in was Election, and only then because it was her only believable performance. Reese Witherspoon is annoying as all hell -- she's not a sweetheart that I can see anyone genuinely desiring (unless that desire includes a certain element of brutality and hatred). I seriously wish I'd been at the show (like Tamara -- updated link!) so I could've yelled, "HEY! SOMEBODY SHUT THAT BITCH UP!" And then when people gasped and inquired aloud who said it, I'd jump up on my chair and shout, "IT WAS ME!!!" And then crayons would rain from the sky.

A movie about gay cowboys actually won awards. Does anyone else have a craving for pudding?

And Crash for Best Picture. Now, I didn't see any of the other nominated films, so I can't comment on how deserving Crash was in comparison, but I didn't think the movie deserved that kind of award. It certainly wasn't the best picture that I saw in 2005. (Of course, with the exception of The Godfather, I've found very few of the winners that I've seen to be worthy of that distinction, but still.) And Crash had a message? It struck me as a pretty shallow and cartoony depiction of racism with an artsy "everything comes full circle" undercurrent that offered very little in the way of actual depth, solutions, or even condemnation. You want to talk about real racism, we'll talk about how films like Hustle & Flow further negative stereotypes and hinder actual progress in this department. "It's hard out here for a pimp?" It should be fucking harder, because pimps should be in jail getting anally raped. Fuck that movie.

All for now -- ja ne, minna-san.

I totally want this.

Couldn't let the month go by without commenting at length on the subject, could we? Actually, I'd very much intended to, but then I happened to catch the latter half of this "That's So Raven" episode. If you get around to reading it, lemme know what you think of the article. Later!

Take that, Oprah Winfrey!

I mean that, people. 🙂 And for an amusing treat, head on over to Scary-Crayon for a couple of relevant articles: a review of Triton's Chocolate Dipped Banana Bits and a rather... thorough assessment of LifeStyles Flavored Condoms! Craziness. It's also kind of interesting that I reference sex ed courses in both of the pieces, since my view of sex in those days still very much represents my attitude towards and understanding of the topic. As in those days, sex isn't something that I think much about at all (except in the joking way reflected in many of the SC Hot Flashes), and while I had crushes at that age and continue to have them, I guess, my romantic fantasies involve moonlit jogs in the park and falling asleep together on the couch watching indie horror films -- not Barry White and naked bedroom romps.

Now that I think about it, it's kind of weird that they taught and continue to teach sex ed to kids at that age, given that the kids who were interested in sex and/or sexually active already knew far more than the courses intended to teach, whereas the rest of us fell into fits of laughter whenever the teacher said "penis" and "vagina". Are the schools trying to sexualize America's youth? I wonder if that's part of their hidden agenda. Hmmm.

Anyway, if you want to celebrate the day with some Teen Titans video goodness, check out this Terra and Beast Boy tribute by amvfan. And if you dig Terra and want to see more of her (why wouldn't you? Terra rocks!), check out this and this too.

Happy V-Day, minna-san! Ja ne. 🙂