Thus revealed, the creature buried its nose in the tire-tilled soil...
August 22, 2008
Defamatory dreams
Category: Dreams

Do you ever have dreams in which people from your life make you very, very angry -- and although those particular infuriating events may not have happened in waking life, the characterization is believable and accurate enough that you stay angry with those people anyway?

I've been having lots of dreams like that lately. 😐

-posted by Wes | 12:45 am | Comments (1)
August 20, 2008
And this time my finger is intact
Category: Toys

Kong has been beheaded at last!

-posted by Wes | 2:30 am | Comments (0)
August 17, 2008
Not quite five by five
Category: Toys … Travels … TV, Film, & DVDs

Five by five?

So for the past couple of weeks or so, I've been on an extended Faith kick. I rewatched the Season 4 episodes of "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" in which she appeared, her appearances in Seasons 1 and 4 of "Angel"... I even sat through those godawful "Buffy" Season 7 episodes for her. And now I'm in the process of watching Season 3 again (skipping the heathen -- that is Faithless -- episodes), though I think I'll take a break from them tonight to watch the "Buffy" Season 2 episodes with Kendra.

(With my renewed Faith and Buffy kick, I ordered a Buffy figure online... but they sent me Kendra by mistake. Of course I shipped her butt back and am awaiting the correct item, but the ordeal has left me with a desire to watch Kendra's few appearances again.)

...the lion and the fatling together...

Anyway, it's sort of fitting that I've been so into Faith lately, since yesterday I accompanied my mother on this church retreat to see the Sight & Sound Theaters production of "In the Beginning." Of course, I really only went because the trip also included a stop at a shopping center with KB Toys and Disney Store Outlet shops, but I did have some minimal interest in seeing the play. I'll write more about the day on Scary-Crayon -- or at least that's the plan; we'll see -- but suffice it to say that few words describe the play so well as flipping retarded. Picture, if you will, brachiosaurs in the Garden of Eden; velociraptors running around in the wilderness following the Fall; Adam and his progeny riding about on a woolly mammoth; horrific angels that looked like a cross between harpies and the robots of death; and, worst and most hilarious of all, a nine-foot-tall purple serpent with glowing red eyes. Adam and Eve's problem wasn't so much that they were disobedient, but rather that they were dumb. Anyone who trusts a giant purple snake with flaming eyes -- and jets of smoke erupting behind it -- deserves whatever the Hell happens as a result.

An okay haul.

Anyway, back to Faith. I didn't find quite as much as I'd hoped at the KB Toys Outlet, and all of the other stores were a total bust... but I did come across Faith figures! And given my current kick, it almost seemed too good to be true -- I was even planning to order a Faith figure this week -- if not eerily coincidental. I mean, while I've seen DC Direct and Mortal Kombat figures in KB before, I'd never seen Buffy figures in KB Toys until that moment. Granted, they looked kind of bad (I had to pick through them in earnest to find ones without completely screwed paint jobs), and Faith was the only character in stock, but still. I had a Faith figure! Even if it didn't look like her, I was rather pleased.

...no.

But I recognized that it seemed too good to be true, and the toys did look a little flimsy... so I got two just in case. And sure enough, as soon as I got home and took the first Faith out of the package, I noticed immediately that something was very, very wrong. Almost every single one of her joints was stuck fast. So right away she went into the freezer, and a good half hour later I removed her to try my luck again. And off came her leg, just like that -- given the way it came off, it looks like the attaching peg was cracked to begin with. I was disappointed, but I did still have the other Faith. She didn't even get the chance to go into the freezer, though, as removing her from the package resulted in her leaving her leg behind right from the outset.

So, yesterday, I lost an entire day on a trip to see a crappy uber-creationist religious play and had my Faith broken. Twice. 👿

Chun-Li has been healed by the power of HOPE!

On the bright side, I'm holding out hope that I can fix the Faiths (or at least one of them; I may just return the other). You may recall my experience with Chun-Li, who broke after I ordered her a while back and had to be replaced. Well, I still had the broken figure... and inspired by these Faith mishaps (what is it with left legs?!) to try my hand at fixing her, I sat down today and did just that. And, as you see, I was successful! Faith looks like she'll be a more difficult -- part of the reason the figure broke in the first place is poor design; while a metal screw will certainly be stronger than the brittle, toothpick-thin plastic peg with which the leg was originally attached, forcing the head of a screw into the tiny space between her legs (hm, this is sounding kinda dirty) will prove rather difficult -- but I'm confident that it can be done. I suppose if all else fails, I could try the Hasbro approach and peg the leg up into the torso. Faith's waist doesn't move, so there should be a lot of space up there for an anchor.

Also, shoofly pie? Terrible. If you ever find yourself in Lancaster County, do yourself a huge favor and pass on that dessert. 😐

-posted by Wes | 9:59 pm | Comments (7)
August 11, 2008
Nightmare Theater
Category: Dreams

Well, that was... weird.

DREAM #1

First, I dreamed that I was at some kind of summer camp -- log cabins, hiking and canoe activities, campfire sing-a-longs, and so forth. A whole bunch of stuff happened in the dream before this, but the horrific moment came when I was flossing my teeth in the bathroom and felt one pop out. Then its neighbor popped out. I took them out and examined them, wondering whether I should wash them and try to put them back in or just leave them out -- and one of them had a wire sticking out of the top of it, which was rather weird -- when suddenly I felt like I had some large obstruction in my mouth that had essentially locked my jaw. I struggled to move my mouth, and when I finally did... all of my teeth erupted out of it in a hail of, well, teeth.

Horrified, I opened my mouth wide and looked into the mirror to confirm that, yes, but for the two teeth in my hand, all of my choppers were in the sink and on the floor. This must be a dream, I thought, and I pinched myself. No go, but it didn't hurt -- at all -- so there was hope! And then I drew back my fist with intent to punch myself really, really hard... when suddenly all of my teeth were back. Then I woke up. (more...)

-posted by Wes | 7:40 am | Comments (4)
August 8, 2008
Look what I just ordered!
Category: Toys

This action figure is fired up and ready for change!

🙂

-posted by Wes | 3:01 pm | Comments (5)