So I was browsing on eBay and I came across this...

...and it took. my. fucking. breath. away. Seriously.

Oh, precious Chun-Li, how I love you and lust after you! Alas, I cannot afford a woman of your surpassing beauty and 1/8th scale form! You're also too high maintenance, as your resin model kit comes unassembled and unpainted! And though I would devote all of my leisure to your successful completion, my love -- yes, I would make you whole! -- I doubt that I could ever make you look quite as beautiful as you do in the picture above. Adieu, my love, adieu! We shall not soon meet in this life.

Yes, I think that I could do it right now. I can scarcely maintain an upright position for exhaustion; a painful amalgamation of queasiness and hunger festers in my gut; my senses are on edge, such that my head swings 'round at the slightest rustle in the distance -- and the office resounds with sound! The hum of the fan, the tick of the clock, footsteps in the hall, voices in the office, the irregular drip of water from the ceiling onto the plastic bag that lines the interior of the trash can behind my desk, a distant beeping from somewhere -- I know not where! -- all of these devils assault my peace of mind and conspire to bring about my fate. And these on top of those unhappy concerns that already plagued my troubled thoughts! Had I a pistol in my desk drawer, I would gladly splatter my brains across its glossy, varnished surface.

I finished reading Goethe's The Sorrows of Young Werther this morning. Poor Werther! Good book.

Hey all. Sorry I haven't gotten that Scary-Crayon review of The White Bone finished yet -- as you can tell from the previous posts (if you haven't read them, go do that), my mind's been pretty occupied this week with all manner of depressing and complex thoughts. You can rest easy, though, at least for the moment -- my "Street Fighter II: V" DVD box set showed up yesterday, and I can't go to my grave without first watching all 29 episodes. Rah. Anyway, hopefully I'll have that review up tonight, along with a long-awaited addition to SC this weekend. No promises regarding that one's completion, but we can hope... and if nothing else, hopefully I'll finish up a new food article for next week or something.

In looking over these graduate programs that fail to captivate me, I'm kind of disappointed that I haven't seen any Philosophy and English/Creative Writing dual degree programs. That would excite me. And teaching philosophical fiction? That would be fun. But I don't see anything like that available. Sigh.

Maybe this weekend I will make substantial progress on my illustrated book as well! Here's hoping. Anyway, gotta get ready for work. Ja.

Did I mention how fucking hot it is in here?!?

Okay, so I don't feel like such an idiot tonight. I went back, took a few more of those practice GRE tests, and kicked major ass. My few wrong answers, with the exception of straight guesses on analogies with words I didn't know, consisted of careless shit like me not paying attention to the question's directions or in fact not seeing the question at all because I somehow scrolled past it. And since, hopefully, the latter wouldn't happen during the test due to the pencil-and-paper format (though I recall having made a similar mistakes on a past test and having had to correct for the error by erasing and shifting all of my answers down one) and I'd be a little more attentive to the former difficulty during the actual exam, I think I'd do fairly well. (more...)

You know what I've been getting a lot of lately? Money-grubbing e-mails from Yale. It fucking pisses me off -- I can't even afford to move out of my mother's house, and here the school that got $140K out of dear old dad for four years of torment and murder/rape accusations and a degree that apparently isn't worth the paper on which it's printed has the audacity to ask me for money so that other undegraduates can have "the same great experience" that I had. And then they have the nerve to write, "Boola Boola!" in the subject line! What the fuck does that mean? Seriously.

I should fucking skin Handsome Dan alive.