Thus revealed, the creature buried its nose in the tire-tilled soil...
February 1, 2006
I think I'm getting the hang of this...

Tammy and the T-Rex, now on DVD!

So after authoring a few basic DVDs, I tried to go for a more complicated one with a chapter menu and even the friggin' trailers from the VHS. Fun. Pretty time consuming, given that I actually had to watch the movie again to pick spots for chapter breaks (ugh), do quite a bit of image work for the menus (about as much as your average Scary-Crayon article, if not slightly more), and learn about the use of variables in the xml structure of DVD authoring programs to get the thing to behave the way I wanted, but I'm now pretty satisfied with my Tammy and the T-Rex DVD. Note the cute little T-Rex selection thingies -- I made those from Joe and Mac screencaps. Pretty cool, eh?

Aaaand now I need to get back to work. Then, Scary-Crayon updates!

-posted by Wes | 8:18 am | Comments (3)
November 28, 2005
And now for something that didn't contribute to my neverending sorrow

Everybody's Famous!

This is a really great movie. And I'm not just saying that because one of the characters is a singer who performs in a blue wig.

''I'll take you with me''

Doesn't hurt, though. Please take me with you, Debbie. 🙁

''His friends smirk with pity''

And what is it about talent that makes people so unbelievably attractive? I actually cried during Marva's song and the scene that precedes it. Beautiful. This was one of those movies that makes one want to track down other films (and television shows) starring the cast members -- Thekla Reuten and Eva van der Gucht in particular. Unfortunately, the vast majority of their work hasn't been released on video. 🙁

And with that frown, we return to my regularly scheduled misery.

-posted by Wes | 10:04 pm | Comments (0)
October 27, 2005
28 Minutes Later...

SO. If you've got a half hour to kill, I invite you to head over to Scary-Crayon and check out the latest Spectare review -- a literally 27+ minute long review and commentary on Flightplan. Or, y'know, if you don't have that kind of time, you can also read the abridged written review over there. Suffice it to say that I fucking despised that film. Not in the way that I thought Serenity and Corpse Bride were kinda blah -- I mean like this was one of the worst films I've ever seen and I'd like to bitchslap everyone who had a hand in making it. That sort of thing. Head to the SC review for more.

Honestly, it's media like Flightplan that have me utterly convinced that the remainder of my life -- should I choose to live it -- will be filled with failure and misery. Not because the movie depicted some heartrending tragedy that totally sucked me in, but because of the sheer number of successful movies, television shows, books, etc. that utterly disgust me, thereby underscoring the all too apparent separation between myself and the rest of society. And since I desire to contribute to these fields -- write books, scripts, even make films and so forth -- it seems to indicate that nothing I do will be well received by anyone of note, since what I'd hope to achieve and accomplish through writing and other media is so vastly different from what the public wants. The subject matter and content of the books on the bestseller lists consistently strikes me as being not only unappealing but insulting, whereas my favorite authors are either out of print or almost unheard of. It's maddening.

I've started writing another short story, but I'm fairly certain that no fiction editor alive would think it worthy of publication or be willing to pay for it. Ja.

-posted by Wes | 5:55 pm | Comments (3)
October 10, 2005
Aaaargh!
Category: Linkage … TV, Film, & DVDs

My connection has been royally sucking since last night, with me getting disconnected roughly every 10-20 minutes and having to reset the DSL modem and router each time to reconnect. It's getting bloody irritating. Finally, I called Verizon's tech support, only to be told (after holding for over 30 mins) that the connection seems exellent and that they don't know what the problem is. Sigh.

Saw Serenity this weekend. Lengthier review to come, but I'll briefly say that I thought it was nothing more than a routine and average space adventure film. Granted, that's not to say that it's entirely unlikable, and I might've liked it a little better if people I know hadn't been writing things like "WHAT A GREAT MOVIE!" and "I FUCKING LOVED IT!" in all caps. With such rave reviews, I was expecting something fantastic -- and instead got "eh". It looked good enough and the dialogue was fun, but the story was pretty much an amalgam of cliches and developments from far superior scifi films and television shows, to say nothing of the more nonsensical aspects. Look for a more detailed spoiler review in the near future.

And finally, a few links:

Ill Will Press -- I've got this site linked over on Scary-Crayon, and I'm pretty sure I've mentioned it over here from time to time, but the latest cartoon is the funniest offering I've seen in a while. Might even be the funniest installment to date. There's just something hilarious about squirrels with voodoo dolls and masochists taking offense at being called "masochists" even as they continue to commit masochistic acts. You have to see it. I wouldn't view the cartoon at work, though. It also has sound, being a Flash 'toon and all.

Unicef bombs the Smurfs -- Okay, so we've all seen parodies of beloved cartoon characters being bombed, raped, murdered, or committing such shocking deeds themselves, and some of the Cartoon Network's Adult Swim stuff has featured Hanna Barbera characters in adult situations -- but a legitimate cartoon featuring the Smurfs being bombed? Look at the image -- SMURFETTE IS DEAD! Simply amazing.

Smegma! -- The word "smeg" was mentioned elsewhere, so I did a few quick lookups and came across this comprehensive definition and etymology of the term from which it is derived -- "smegma" -- on Wikepedia. Not recommended for work viewing, as there are images of penises with smegma on them, but it's a pretty interesting and entertaining read, if only for the sentence that reads, "This can in turn upset the pH of the vagina." Hilarity.

All for now. Ja ne, minna-san.

-posted by Wes | 1:43 pm | Comments (1)
October 7, 2005
Twins on Scary-Crayon!

Okay, since I started the Scary-Crayon blog I haven't been so quick to mention site updates over here (if I mention them at all), but as I'm particularly pleased with the first part of this latest film review I invite y'all to check Protégé de la Rose Noire, Partie Une out. It's pretty much work-safe, though there is one instance where the word "fuck" appears in large type on screen -- but seeing as how that's the part where I'm talking about the castration robot, I think it's wholly justified. I mean holy fuck, the thing castrates men. It's a Castraticon. Megatron might turn into a gun and shoot you, but this robot will cut your penis off (if you have one). Prime only turns into a truck. Anyway, go read!

-posted by Wes | 6:52 am | Comments (0)