Thus revealed, the creature buried its nose in the tire-tilled soil...
October 10, 2005
Category: Linkage … TV, Film, & DVDs

My connection has been royally sucking since last night, with me getting disconnected roughly every 10-20 minutes and having to reset the DSL modem and router each time to reconnect. It's getting bloody irritating. Finally, I called Verizon's tech support, only to be told (after holding for over 30 mins) that the connection seems exellent and that they don't know what the problem is. Sigh.

Saw Serenity this weekend. Lengthier review to come, but I'll briefly say that I thought it was nothing more than a routine and average space adventure film. Granted, that's not to say that it's entirely unlikable, and I might've liked it a little better if people I know hadn't been writing things like "WHAT A GREAT MOVIE!" and "I FUCKING LOVED IT!" in all caps. With such rave reviews, I was expecting something fantastic -- and instead got "eh". It looked good enough and the dialogue was fun, but the story was pretty much an amalgam of cliches and developments from far superior scifi films and television shows, to say nothing of the more nonsensical aspects. Look for a more detailed spoiler review in the near future.

And finally, a few links:

Ill Will Press -- I've got this site linked over on Scary-Crayon, and I'm pretty sure I've mentioned it over here from time to time, but the latest cartoon is the funniest offering I've seen in a while. Might even be the funniest installment to date. There's just something hilarious about squirrels with voodoo dolls and masochists taking offense at being called "masochists" even as they continue to commit masochistic acts. You have to see it. I wouldn't view the cartoon at work, though. It also has sound, being a Flash 'toon and all.

Unicef bombs the Smurfs -- Okay, so we've all seen parodies of beloved cartoon characters being bombed, raped, murdered, or committing such shocking deeds themselves, and some of the Cartoon Network's Adult Swim stuff has featured Hanna Barbera characters in adult situations -- but a legitimate cartoon featuring the Smurfs being bombed? Look at the image -- SMURFETTE IS DEAD! Simply amazing.

Smegma! -- The word "smeg" was mentioned elsewhere, so I did a few quick lookups and came across this comprehensive definition and etymology of the term from which it is derived -- "smegma" -- on Wikepedia. Not recommended for work viewing, as there are images of penises with smegma on them, but it's a pretty interesting and entertaining read, if only for the sentence that reads, "This can in turn upset the pH of the vagina." Hilarity.

All for now. Ja ne, minna-san.

-posted by Wes | 1:43 pm | Comments (1)
October 7, 2005
Twins on Scary-Crayon!

Okay, since I started the Scary-Crayon blog I haven't been so quick to mention site updates over here (if I mention them at all), but as I'm particularly pleased with the first part of this latest film review I invite y'all to check Protégé de la Rose Noire, Partie Une out. It's pretty much work-safe, though there is one instance where the word "fuck" appears in large type on screen -- but seeing as how that's the part where I'm talking about the castration robot, I think it's wholly justified. I mean holy fuck, the thing castrates men. It's a Castraticon. Megatron might turn into a gun and shoot you, but this robot will cut your penis off (if you have one). Prime only turns into a truck. Anyway, go read!

-posted by Wes | 6:52 am | Comments (0)
October 2, 2005
Sway with me

I really like Jennifer Connelly in Dark City. So much, in fact, that I was inspired to sing the song her character performs when first introduced in the film at her nightclub singing gig (though the woman doing the singing is really Anita Kelsey). Anyway, go ahead and click the image -- or here -- to hear my awful singing. I took the audio quality down quite a bit to make the file smaller, but it's not like you needed to hear me in 44 KHz stereo sound!

Side note: I think dressing in drag and singing in a small Vegas club would be a pretty cool job.

-posted by Wes | 7:03 pm | Comments (7)
September 22, 2005
SC Update & Anytime Movies.

Quick post before I shove off to bed. First, Scary-Crayon was updated tonight, so if that at all interests you, go have a look. I mention it here because it's a pretty serious piece -- a book review cum sociolinguistic (?) commentary -- and since it's more in the vein of something I'd write here, if you find my observations on Wesoteric to be interesting, you may find that piece to be a worthwhile read as well. And since it's on SC, if you've got comments, I invite you to share them with the class over there. (more...)

-posted by Wes | 4:49 am | Comments (3)
August 29, 2005
Sigh ;___;

Quick update. I've been browsing apartment listings and making calls all day -- very exhausting. And FRUSTRATING! This one lady told me that I wasn't qualified, financially speaking, to live in her building. WHAT? Something about it being 48% of the yearly income I gave, as if it would be impossible for me to pay rent. Dude, I could get by on an average of $30 a week -- MAX -- so I could totally have afforded that place. But after she started talking about it I didn't want it anyway, so whatever.

Suffice it to say that my apartment hunting has not been going very well and I'm wondering what the hell I was thinking in the first place to resign from my position and decide to move out of here. I could've just stayed in the same job and lived here with my mother through my forties until finally deciding to shoot myself through the brain and nobody would've said anything like, "Oh, such a shame; he had so much potential blah blah blah," because they wouldn't even have been able to say it with a straight face anymore. Hahahaha.

Also, saw The 40 Year Old Virgin this weekend. Thought it was funny, but one thing that I found kind of odd was the representation of the male body in the film. I mean, I'm well aware that not every guy out there is cut/buff/etc., but really the only shirtless male torsos that I'm familiar with are my own and those of fictional characters and sculptures -- or similarly buff guys in magazines or jogging through the streets -- so it was kind of weird to see these guys whose bodies were quite noticeably less than "perfect." I mean, I know I've seen other men without shirts who weren't "sculpted" in my lifetime, but apparently I just looked through them, because they failed to leave an impression on my mind -- whereas watching the movie I couldn't help but see these kinda flabby (and hairy) guys and it just struck me as really weird. I dunno.

I'm tired so I'll sleep now. Ja!

-posted by Wes | 11:54 pm | Comments (2)