I'd never heard of this guy before seeing his program on television the other night, but holy fuck is he spewing some crazy shit. Granted, it's not uniquely crazy -- he kept perseverating on the same one-world government and end-of-times Antichrist nonsense believed so fervently by the nuttier Christian sects and depicted so well in the Left Behind series (haven't read the books, but those movies are creepy) -- but still. I actually had no idea they allowed this insanity on television, let alone on regular channels.
Speaking of insanity, how about that Rexella? The whole program is pretty nuts, but this woman just batshit crazy. Look at those eyes!
Screw the book, Rexxy -- just send me some of whatever you're popping. That said, she does look damned good for being almost 80... I'm guessing those donations have allowed her to hire a pretty good plastic surgeon. Praise Jesus!
Against my better judgment, I also went to their website. From conspiracy material about one-world currency to embedded microchips being the mark of the beast, that place has a wealth of nuttiness -- particularly in the questions that viewers send in. My favorites, however, are questions like this one, where folks write in to ask if being in debt will prevent them from being taken up in the Rapture. It absolutely amazes me that people are concerned with shit like this. I mean, I think it's fascinating how people combine real-world stuff -- debt -- with magical religious fantasies into a semi-coherent worldview and actually manage to function more or less well (even if their financial management skills could use some work). How does that work?!
I think it's because of laziness and lack of motivation, to tell you the truth. I mean, I've never really believed intensely in Christianity or God in general, but even during the time that I seriously contemplated that stuff I went quite a bit nuttier than I already am. I mean, sin is that which does not glorify God, right? And how much shit doesn't glorify God? I enjoy watching cartoons and fiddling with action figures, but -- unless you jump through some crazy hoops about how they are expressions of human creativity and imagination and therefore glorify God because they evince the awesomeness of His creation -- these do not glorify God. So instead of being able to enjoy anything, the truly devout individual would be constantly questioning whether A or B or C or D or E or F or G or H or I or J and so on glorifies God and would probably go completely mad as a result -- unless he or she were sheltered in such a way that one can truly devote oneself to God 24/7. The most devout believers must be in convents, cloisters, or padded cells; anything less is just kinda half-assed.
And while certain beliefs don't necessarily follow from others, to believe in God and the Bible is in many cases to believe in angels and demons and a freaky supernatural existence where all sorts of terrifying weirdness is possible. Seriously, whatever you do, never convince me that the shit in the Bible is true. I'm pretty harmless, but believing that stuff would still bring me that much closer to driving a stake through your heart on suspicion of you being a demon vampire impostor if you appear cranky around me following a sleepless night. And once I'd washed the blood from my hands, I'd look straight into the bathroom mirror and entreat my reflection to write me so that I could send it a book that would change its life forever.
Occasionally I dip back into discussions of religion and theology and eschatology for fun, but I've since realized that I can never take them seriously. For me -- and for the Van Impes and their viewers, apparently -- that path leads inevitably to madness.