Thus revealed, the creature buried its nose in the tire-tilled soil...
November 10, 2005
A suicidal haiku.
Category: Miscellany

Why does God hate me?
Maybe I will find out soon!
When I hang myself.

-posted by Wes | 12:52 am | Comments (2)
November 8, 2005
I totally need my own radio show.
Category: Serious

So here's a brief commentary I wrote last week concerning the tribute to Rosa Parks. I sent it to NPR, but somehow I doubt they'd print/air it!

Last Monday, Rosa Parks was honored for her legendary role in the Civil Rights Movement with a memorial service at the Metropolitan African Methodist Episcopal Church and a slew of news segments lauding Parks' seated stand while managing to say surprisingly little about the rest of her 92 year life. And I don't know how others felt as they watched these fawning bits, but the excessively sycophantic nature of these segments and overuse of the same key phrases rang so false to my ears that I was only "moved" to change the channel in disgust. I don't mean to underemphasize Parks' involvement or dedication to the movement, mind you, but a lot of other factors contributed to its success. Not only do I very much doubt that Parks the first person to be arrested for refusing to give up her seat, but her act would hardly have been so effective if Martin Luther King, Jr., hadn't called for the Montgomery Bus Boycott, nor would his merely calling for the boycott have made any waves whatsoever if not for the compliance of the manifold participants. Listening to the tributes to Parks, however, one would think that she single-handedly brought about the end of segregation and ushered America into a new age in which skin color is a moot point and everyone is treated as an individual -- an age which, by the way, is so far from our present that (if the present glorification of racial stereotypes and social ostracism facing persons who don't adhere to them serve as any indication), most people appear to have given up on it.

I also thought it was pretty ghoulish that people were traveling from all over to visit a corpse in the Capital on Halloween (to say nothing of hearing the terrible demon Oprah Winfrey speak), but maybe that's just me.

-posted by Wes | 7:46 pm | Comments (1)
November 7, 2005
The Fortune Cookie lies.
Category: Miscellany

Today, I got a fortune cookie with a message that read:

YOUR LOVE LIFE WILL BE HAPPY AND HARMONIOUS.

I laughed for like the next four minutes. Then I sighed and continued on with my miserable existence.

Also, I was watching "Celebrity Poker Showdown" earlier and have come to the conclusion that Lacey Chabert is just adorable.

-posted by Wes | 6:30 pm | Comments (3)
November 6, 2005
Imagine that!
Category: SC Updates

Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash #56 is up on Scary-Crayon. I think this is one of the best ones yet, but then I had amazing material to work with. You'll see. Spam is insane, dudes.

-posted by Wes | 10:17 am | Comments (0)
November 5, 2005
Cartoon observations and reviews.
Category: Serious

Has anyone else noticed that child characters in American cartoons often exhibit a maturity far beyond their fictional years? I was just watching Juniper Lee, whom I'd always assumed (based on her interests, friends, attitude, etc.) was somewhere in the neighborhood of 15 or 16 years old, when she commented that she's 11. What? You've got characters like the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, who are supposed to be teenagers, yet they've not only managed to master a centuries old martial art and lifestyle with extremely limited resources and training, but then you've got Donatello routinely constructing inventions far beyond anything modern science can produce -- and with no formal education or funding whatsoever. The same goes for the Teen Titans (though I think the Titans are funded by Cyborg's wealthy father, and Robin could probably secure additional finances from Batman if necessary) and other kid superhero groups, almost all of which are self-sufficient despite the members' young ages. And sure, the Turtles have Splinter watching over them in a fatherly capacity, but considering that the average lifespan for rats is 2-3 years, with the maximum recorded rat lifespan being 7 years and 4 months, how much older than the Turtles can he really be? (To say nothing of the astonishing notion that he somehow mastered ninjitsu in such a short length of time! Of course, this particular difficulty is absent if we consider the origin story in which Splinter and Hamato Yoshi are one and the same.) And then there are infants like Stewie Griffin ("Family Guy") and Baby Herman (Who Framed Roger Rabbit?), though their exaggerated maturity is employed for comic effect.

Younger characters in anime, on the other hand, more often than not seem an accurate reflection of their ages -- though this may be a function of certain cultural differences, as the humor and artistic style of many animes (the vast majority of which, in my experience, have focused on the adventures of younger characters) seems, to American sensibilities, more illustrative of juvenile attitudes.

If there were graduate programs offering degrees in cartoon scholarship, I'd totally be down.

Oh, and speaking of cartoons, here are my early reviews of the premiere episodes of "The Boondocks" and "MinoriTEAM"... (more...)

-posted by Wes | 1:33 pm | Comments (1)