Thus revealed, the creature buried its nose in the tire-tilled soil...
January 31, 2010
Name those... yeah... Part 1!
Category: Miscellany … SC Updates … TV, Film, & DVDs

SO! I was going through some old graphics folders looking for a photo to include in my latest Scary-Crayon article -- which contains some stuff personal enough that I almost cut it from the piece and posted it here, so readers of my blog who don't typically enjoy SC might still want to check it out -- and I came across a couple of images I thought it might be fun to post. And heck, I thought, we might as well make a game out of it! So see if you can identify the stuff in these pics via the comments (if you like), and I'll post again in a day or so to let you know how you did.

"What happened to the love in lovemaking?"

Back in college, I wrote articles and created some graphics for a student magazine for a couple of semesters -- and this is the graphic I made using some sprites and a background for one particular feature. See if you can guess which two respective games the sprites and background came from! I'll give you a hint -- both games share the same protagonists, and I reviewed one of them on SC (the list of relevant articles is here).

Hmmm...

And since today's update also saw me rooting around in my DVD screen capture directory, I figured I'd post this image and challenge you to Name That Ass! That is, I challenge you to guess whose ass that is. And the legs, since they obviously belong to the same person. And I know what you're thinking, Mickey -- that's not the right answer. 😉 In fact, this screencap came from a children's movie made in the 1990s. It currently has an IMDb user rating below 4.0. (If you really wanna play, this search tool may prove useful. It's pretty useful anyway, actually. I just found out about it!)

Okey-doke, post your guesses in the comments -- among whatever else you'd like to write -- and I'll reveal the answers in a few days or so. (And I still haven't forgotten about your questions, Mickey!) Ja!

-posted by Wes | 3:58 am | Comments (8)
January 9, 2010
Comments on the latest "Dollhouse" episode

I tend to post to #db while watching shows, especially if folks there have already seen the episodes or will see them soon. I try to avoid comments that are too spoilery, so what I have to say is generally pretty shallow and unspecific, but hopefully my reaction to the final development will be apparent from the comments below! Here's what I wrote about last night's "Dollhouse":

<Wes> I can totally see Glau's booty through her skirt

<Wes> aaaand all is forgotten with the return of AA

<Wes> Journeybro!

<Wes> nooooez

<Wes> I'd wish I had more time with that loveliness too
<Wes> time for blue hair dye jobs

<Wes> wait what the fuck

<Wes> FOUR KNOCKS
<Wes> THE END OF THE DOCTOR

<Wes> ...
<Wes> what
<Wes> fuck this show

The usual suspects are already raving about how awesome the episode was, but I thought it was bloody stupid. Yeah, there were a couple of revelations -- one in particular -- that were "shocking" and unexpected, but it was in that comic-esque "ONO my new wife is actually my dead twin sister's baby from the future" way. Apparently the next episode or so will attempt to convince us that this twist was really in the works all along, but there really was no reason to suspect it -- unless one was simply expecting the least likely result to obtain for no apparent reason. I hate shit like that.

It's in these instances that the writing disparities between inferior shows like "Dollhouse" and "Heroes" (and "Smallville") and superior shows like "Dexter" are most apparent. The former shows drop these WTF moments on you without any warning, almost such that it seems like even the writers didn't decide to go that route until fairly recently in the story. With "Dexter," there are certainly WTF moments -- but they've not only clearly been carefully plotted beforehand, but also set up to the extent that the viewer has probably interpreted at least some of the clues correctly.

A good show gradually lays down the puzzle pieces in order to build towards the greater picture, though it might drop two or six pieces on you in rapid succession at key moments. Shows like "Dollhouse" meander along and then throw technicolor posters in your face while screaming, "BLAMMO!! YOU WEREN'T EXPECTING THAT, WERE YOU?!?!?"

And no, I wasn't expecting that -- but it's still bloody stupid.

-posted by Wes | 6:59 am | Comments (4)
January 4, 2010
Doctor Who Bingo and the End of Time

The 10th Doctor's final episode -- the second part of "The End of Time" -- ended up being quite a bit better than I expected it to be, considering that the first part was absolute rubbish. Figuring that it would be awful, I set out to make the experience a little more enjoyable during my New Year's Day viewing by printing out two (one, two!) of the various Bingo cards circling the web, grabbing a handful of change, and mixing up a rather strong Bloody Maribelle -- which is my name for a Bloody Mary with a few spoonfuls of sugar; I think the sugar enabled me to tolerate twice the amount of vodka I'd normally put into one. It was a very nice drink.

[WARNING: The second image below may contain spoilers if you can read very tiny print, so you may want to avoid clicking to see the larger version if you haven't watched the episode. There are also some spoilers in the following discussion, so proceed with caution!]

Before!
After!

Even though the episode didn't entirely suck, I can safely say that that potent Bloody Maribelle made the experience of watching it that much more enjoyable. I think I would've been much more annoyed by the Oodsong if I hadn't been well tipsy by that point! (more...)

-posted by Wes | 10:55 pm | Comments (1)
December 5, 2009
Too Ugly For Love

So I actually watched this ages ago and meant to write a bit about it, but I never did. I did, however, pull up a few links about it... which have been sitting among my Firefox tabs for the last few months. And I'd like to clear them now, so I'll say a bit about the program!

Back in... September, I guess, Mom was flipping through channels and we came across Too Ugly For Love on BBC America. I wasn't really sure what it was about at first -- they were just following this guy around who thought he was so ugly that he couldn't be seen in public without sunglasses. And yeah, he was kinda ugly. Not hideously so, mind you -- you probably wouldn't even give him a second glance on the street -- but he certainly wasn't Brad Pitt. Anyway, I didn't understand why he was so convinced of his horrific ugliness, especially since I couldn't imagine the sunglasses doing all that much unless they were hiding hanging Slobulus eyeballs. (more...)

-posted by Wes | 8:33 pm | Comments (0)
September 11, 2009
Recently seen: hateful movies

I know I've seen a few movies in recent memory that I didn't absolutely despise -- Private Parts was, um, interesting; I rather liked G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra despite its numerous shortcomings; and I enjoyed Iron Man (though I still don't think it approaches Spider-Man 2 greatness) -- but it seems like most of the movies I've watched as of late have outright sucked.

"Sucked" is italicized above, of course, because most of the movies I've seen recently have been vampire movies. I'm not even including Twilight among these -- yeah, that wasn't great, but I can't really call it bad. It was just derivative emo teenybopper fare that seemed cribbed from early "Buffy" season developments (not to mention the entirety of "Roswell"), with the only original contribution being the vampires' glittering in sunlight instead of burning. And that was stupid. (more...)

-posted by Wes | 4:04 pm | Comments (2)