Thus revealed, the creature buried its nose in the tire-tilled soil...
January 6, 2006
Chocolate makes for crazy sleep
Category: Dreams

So, have you ever had one of those days on which you don't want to get out of bed because you're having this really odd and interesting dream and you know that despite being woken by the alarm and being completely awake and even having gone to the bathroom and drunk a glass of water, you'll be able to resume the dream when you crawl back under the covers and close your eyes? Well, that's totally what kept me from crawling out of bed until around 3:30 PM yesterday (and I probably would've stayed even longer, but I had to get to work!) despite initially having set my alarm for 11:00 AM and constantly re-setting it to wake me 45 minutes later every time it interrupted my wacky hijinx on the other side of consciousness. Admittedly, I used to have days like this all the time during my junior year of college (seriously, I'd even skip classes and/or attend them with the express intention of sleeping through them, all for the pleasure of gallavanting with my supernatural pals in a twisted version of the Greek pantheon), which I think had something to do with the fact that I was subsisting on like twenty cookies and a single tuna fish sandwich a day. Similarly, attribute yesterday's adventure to my insane consumption of little chocolate bars over the past couple of days. What's going to happen when I go to sleep upon finishing this post? I can't wait to find out!

I sadly don't remember the dream in its entirety -- or at least I'm pretty sure that more happened, given the length of time that I was asleep and the paucity of details that I can currently recall -- but somehow I ended up hanging out in the parking lot of a local shopping center with two girls who were or were at least somehow based upon I've never actually met in real life. Now, as far as I know, in the real world they've never met each other unless through interactions in my comments section and are related only in the sense that I adore them both, but for some reason they were sisters in the dream. They were also both about my age, despite the fact that one of them is like ten years my senior.

So anyway, we're sitting in this parking lot, talking, and one sister starts going on about how she's totally about to throw up. For some reason this prompts me to take her hand and start telling her that everything's going to be okay -- as if she's just confided that she's been diagnosed with a terrible disease or that she's just found out that aliens have eaten her entire family -- whereupon she comments on the coldness of my hands. She then proceeds to talk about how, at length, she was nervous earlier in the day, and this nervousness caused her to sweat so profusely from her hands that the resultant river came up to her ankles.

She leaves to go throw up in the bathroom of the nearby McDonald's, leaving me alone with the other sister. I forget what we talked about, but after a bit this sister notes that she's cold and is going to walk home -- and for some reason I assume that she lives just around the corner and will be okay. When her sister returns from puking, she tells me that, in truth, they live far, far away, and that terrible danger will befall her sister if we do not find her before she reaches her destination. In hindsight, this strikes me as being kinda odd, seeing as how if she got home she'd be okay, but in the dream I just went along with it.

This sister drove a double-decker bus with a scouting post protruding from the top of it. She drove; I stood at this high, vantage point and peered into the distance in search of the sister. We traversed many bumpy roads, with me almost falling out of this post a number of times and being quite hot underneath the glare of the desert sun, because our travels took us across the desert -- which somehow happened to be located in the middle of my hometown -- and back into an area of this city, and then into a bizarro version of shopping center from which we'd started. Finally, we ended up at this massive high-rise apartment building, where apparently the sisters lived, whereupon we were going to wait for the sister to arrive so that we could intercept her before she entered, because terrible things would happen if she entered alone after having come that long way on foot. And because we needed to spot her from a distance, we sat on the roof of the bus, keeping watch and eating jelly sandwiches while wiggling our bare toes and telling jokes.

That's all I remember. Wacky, no? And now it's time for me to retire for the night! In the meantime, if you've anything to suggest in the way of analysis, ah'm list'nin'. 😉

-posted by Wes | 5:23 am | Comments (0)
December 31, 2005
They stole this scene from my fantasies.
Category: Dreams

When Anakaris met Felicia

BLUE HAIR!!! And you know, I've always wanted to be Pharoah of Egypt.

-posted by Wes | 2:13 am | Comments (2)
October 25, 2005
Untitled.
Category: Dreams

So it's been a while since I wrote anything of substance here. Haven't had much to say, really. The grad school thing hasn't been going very well -- I think I may need to spend more time researching the various programs and options, figuring out what I want to do in the future, etc. than the earlier deadlines permit. And I'm still so uncertain about everything. I'm considering joining up with the Peace Corps or submitting an application for Teach For America. Fuck, I'm even thinking about enlisting. Or taking a bath with a toaster. Hopefully things will come together soon, but honestly I don't see how they're going to. Sighs all around.

Lately I've been very cold and haven't been able to shake this feeling of constant dread: I always feel as if I'm on my way to take a very difficult examination for which I haven't studied -- I don't even know what's going to be on the damned thing -- yet its results will determine the course of the rest of my life. My gut is contracting, my teeth are chattering, my skin is covered with goosebumps. My head hurts. I'd just as soon hide in my room feigning sickness (though it wouldn't exactly be feigning sickness, since I'm so sick with worry I can barely walk without collapsing into a shaking mess) and send the Dean an e-mail to ask for an extension, but that's not an option anymore.

But if I swallow sleeping pills
I might escape these dreadful chills
They'll dress me in my Sunday best
and I won't have to take that test.

Last week I had some interesting dreams -- dreams of running helter-skelter through open fields filled with zombies and climbing wooden fences with cracking white paint and dashing down dusty country roads with a slender girl slung over my shoulder; dreams of hiding on my knees amidst pews in huge worship halls, chanting protection spells as armed gladiators rushed at granite devils wielding slim revolvers and holding the hands of wounded damsels as the light of life left their shining eyes.

Ja ne.

-posted by Wes | 9:44 am | Comments (5)
October 12, 2005
Make it stop.
Category: Dreams … Serious

I'd like to be sleeping right now, but they've been at it outside with the jackhammers for the last hour. I wonder if what they're doing is part of an intricate scheme to take over the world or otherwise upset the foundation of society. Or is it all in my head? It's giving me a fucking headache. And since I can't really do anything that requires much concentration -- and therefore a certain measure of quiet -- I'm writing another blog entry.

The blood on her hand is her own.

Question for the creative types: How often do you have ideas for projects for which you think, if you were able to complete them (and the public actually paid attention), people would violently attack you and even try to kill you for vocally expressing so contrary a point of view? Because maybe I'm just paranoid, or overestimating the uniqueness of my own ideas, or underestimating the capacity of people to tolerate, understand, and even accept new and differing ideas (as opposed to simply ignoring them; I can't even get people to publish my fiction, with "too didactic" being among the primary reasons cited for the rejection of my work), but I think I have ideas for enterprises like that at least twice a week. (more...)

-posted by Wes | 10:31 am | Comments (6)
October 1, 2005
SC Articles, Strange Dreams, Year 24
Category: Dreams … SC Updates

I've been wanting to write something here, but lately I haven't had the energy to write much of anything. Well, I've gotten two Scary-Crayon articles up this week -- The Infernal Realm of Paid Surveys and Spider-Man is gross -- but that's about it. I've been sleeping 16 hours a day and feeling like crap and doing little when I am awake. Meh.

So I was lying in bed the other day at 4 PM and was thinking to myself that since my dreams are both more interesting and preferable to my waking life, I may as well just go ahead and end it all. If death is like a long sleep, then it'd definitely be an improvement, and if it's nothing at all... it'd still be an improvement. And then I slipped into sleep and had a strange dream. I was somehow living alone in this house that was apparently based on my current one, but things were in different places -- sort of like when you play a video game in the special "arrange" mode that mixes up the locations of the puzzles. Or maybe all houses share certain similarities. Anyway, the kitchen was on the second floor, the cereal pantry was in the dining room as opposed to the kitchen -- things like that. But there was no furniture anywhere in the house save a small portable television and a telephone on the wall.

Everything looked grey. The wind outside was whipping so fiercely that all of the doorknobs shook as if someone were trying to get in -- and all of the locks appeared to be broken or loose such that I had to struggle against the wind to keep the doors closed. And judging from the fact that my suitcase was open and in a different location from where I had placed it -- apparently I had packed all of my few possessions in this place into a suitcase; I think I had just arrived there -- it seemed as if someone had been inside, but nothing was missing.

But what struck as being most interesting about the dream was that I kept thinking to myself that if I stayed in this place a little longer I would find out why I was there, though I couldn't remember at that moment. The next morning, when I woke up and began to get ready for work as part of my routine, would it strike me then? Or when the landlord or whomever called and/or showed up to collect rent -- I assumed I was paying rent on the place -- would he/she have proof of employment that would tell me where I was supposed to be? Or was I living in the place with a roommate -- it was a pretty big place for just me -- who could tell me what was going on when he/she got in? And even if none of these things obtained I was certain that I would remember why I was there with just a little more time -- when the wind stopped and the sun shone in through the dusty windows and the doors stopped making so damned much noise.

I woke up before any of that happened. When I realized where I was, my first thought was, "Okay, maybe my dreams aren't preferable to my waking life." But then I thought that they were definitely more interesting -- and now, considering the certainty I had that things would somehow come together, maybe that dream was preferable to my present state after all. Of course, my thinking that things would've come together doesn't necessarily mean that they would have -- or that I would have continued to feel so confident about my unusual predicament.

My dreams last night were much more exciting, but I can't quite recall what they were about.

And my birthday's next Tuesday. It's going to suck, like it did last year and the year before that. The year before that it wasn't so bad, but that year I was in school and some people actually came by to hang out with me for a bit. Wonder how they're doing.

Ja ne.

-posted by Wes | 12:12 am | Comments (5)
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